Out of Zambia

It has been quite a while since my last story. As you all probably have heard, Robert and I went on a two week holiday through the country. My girlfriend Peggy visited me for two weeks and the three of us decided to go on a trip. In the last two weeks I have seen more than in my first three months. I must admit that I was very nervous to see Peg again after three months. But everything turned out well. The whole drive from the airport to the hostel we hugged and kissed. We actually did this for two weeks long. We did not care what other people think. We are young and in love, right? Because Peggy landed in Lusaka we decided to stay in Lusaka for the weekend. Here we did a tour through one of Lusaka’s biggest townships. Robert and I already went on this tour once before so we knew what to expect. It was much more impressive this time because the dry season has started. We had a chance to see how big the township really was instead of the small corner of the area we saw last time. The slum was very large and the living conditions of the people are difficult to describe in words. If you take a good look at the pics you can see it for yourself. The photos are very good but I must say witnessing it with your bare eyes is even more impressive. In the township almost all the women are hard workers, they feed their children, doing laundry, preparing dinner and some of them even work in a shop at the market to increase their income, though the men are drinking self brewed beer and metaphorically speaking playing with their cock. We also even drank this self brewed beer as you can see on the pics. I must say that it smells and probably even tastes as acetone. Don’t ask me why they call this shitty drink beer but according to a lot of Zambians it’s just beer. Anyway after this impressive morning tour we visited the National Museum of Lusaka, which was very interesting. In this museum you could see a lot of Zambia’s art its culture and history. After an hour or two of seriousness we left the museum and went back to drink a Mosi and relax at Lusaka backpackers, the hostel where we always stay during our Lusaka trips.

The next morning we had to wake up early for our big safari trip! The three of us were very excited so it wasn’t difficult to jump out of our beds. Weeks before Peggy even arrived Robert and I already scheduled the whole trip so we could not get bored quick. In Lusaka backpackers we met a British man named Alec. He is the owner of Bongwe Safari’s and after a small talk we both were very enthusiastic. So Robert and I decided to go on a four day safari instead of a three day safari we first had in mind. We paid 450 USD this includes accommodation, drinks, dinner, all the game drives and the trip from Lusaka, which we I think is a fair price. First we would go to Lower Zambezi but a week before our trip Alec told us that the water still was too high to see the whole park, so he recommended going to Kafue National Park instead. This park is the 5th biggest park of the world, 22,400 km2 and has the size of the American State Texas. The park is a four hour drive from Lusaka. Unfortunately Alec wasn’t able to join us, so another guy guided us for the next four days. His name was Jairis, a very friendly man from Zimbabwe. We were fully packed and prepared for the trip to the park. However what we did not foresee was the tsetse fly blitzkrieg. When we entered the national park suddenly out of nowhere hundreds of tsetse flies entered our car through the open windows. All of us were getting bitten by the little brown cunts, so we went in defense by hitting them with our slippers and shoes. Victory was ours as we finally entered Hippo lodge, where we slept during our stay. When I saw the lodge I could not believe my eyes, it was incredibly luxurious. The room I slept in with Peggy was like a honeymoon suite and it was totally worth the money. The lodge was on the Kafue River and you could see hippo swimming in the water. The camp was not enclosed so every wild animal was able to enter the lodge. While I was having a bath I could see out of my window some warthogs enjoying their own mud bath just in front of our room at one point, it was very funny and amazing to see. When the three of us had our bath we went on a boat cruise to see the sunset at the river. This was one of the most beautiful sunsets I have ever seen. Just imagine sitting in a small boat on the Kafue River surrounded by hippo, fish eagles and many other stunning animals which complete Africa’s finest nature. If you see the pictures you would probably agree with me. After the boat cruise we had dinner. The food was very nice and after dinner there was time for some relaxation.
When we gained our strengths again we finally went on the first night drive. It was my first safari ever so I was fully prepared. Wearing my Bear Grills safari trousers and shirt I clicked my camera on my belt, put on my hat and tossed my binoculars over my head. I looked like the real deal. Never show up as an amateur and always pretend that you are some dude who works for Animal Planet or something, that makes the whole safari even more interesting. When we jumped in the jeep with all the safari gear you can imagine we drove away from hippo lodge. The first night drive was immediately a success. I mean at first we did not see that much, but on our way back to the lodge we saw this male leopard laying down on the road just four meters in front of the car. The cat was incredible big and the spots on its fur were beautiful. He wasn’t shy neither scared. We had to wait until he left the road, which was no problem for us off course, to reunite his female who was waiting for him further in the bush. After our pleasant meeting with mister leopard we got back in the lodge again. Some guard walked us to our house, in case we got attacked by some wild animal. The next morning we woke up at seven o’clock. There was time for some quick breakfast before we started our first day drive. After one minute we spotted the first antelope. The three of us did not know how fast we could make a picture of it. We looked like some fucking japs. I mean what would you have done on your first real safari? Probably the same, right? Anyway, after seeing hundreds of impala, bushbucks, puku’s and waterbucks we were dying to see something else. We were lucky that Jairis knew a lot of Africa’s nature, so he could tell some stories about some trees and plants on moments when we saw no animals. He even told this story, that some people in Zimbabwe use the fruits of the sausage tree to cure skin cancer. On one of the pictures you can clearly see the tree with its sausage looking fruits. While Jairis was telling this story, suddenly out of nothing an elephant stood next to the car. This wasn’t a normal elephant though. If you get a closer look at one of the pictures you can see that this male had five legs instead of four. We had to be very careful because mister five legs was not happy us disturbing him with his masturbating. Luckily we could drive away safely and prevent us as victims of a big sex crime. During the same drive we saw some vultures and eagles flying in circles. We hoped for a kill but unfortunately we could not find anything.
All the other game drives were as successful as the first two. In total we saw four leopards, two elephants, seven zebra, hundreds of antelope, bush babies, hippo, crocodile’s and many beautiful birds. Although we followed some lion and hyena tracks we unfortunately weren’t able to find them. Next to all the game drives we also went fishing. Every simple fool can fish on the Kafue River. There is so many fish! I think we might have caught over sixty fish, but only twenty five of them were big enough to keep for dinner. We caught bream, bubble fish, silver bubble fish, mud suckers and even some leopard squeakers. The taste of the fresh caught fish was fantastic.
Altogether it was an unforgettable trip!

After the safari we took a long bus drive to Livingstone to see the Victoria Falls and I must say the stories are true. It was amazing and there was a lot of water! The path that leaded us right across the falls left us completely soaked, but with 30 degrees it didn’t take long to dry up again. There were also a lot of baboons at the falls. These monkeys were aggressive little punks. One of them almost attacked Robert because he came to close with his camera while the monkey was mating with his female. Anyway it was a funny experience. The next morning Robert decided to jump off from a 94 m cliff with a 53 m free fall. I thought it was a crazy idea but he really enjoyed it. While he was busy the whole morning jumping and flying of cliffs, Peggy and I went sightseeing. Later that afternoon we met at Jollyboys backpackers, the place where we stayed during our Livingstone trip. During dinner we decided to do a game walk/walking safari in Mosi-oa-Tunya national park. This is the only place to see the White Rhino in whole of Zambia. Again we saw different kinds of wild animals. There were zebra, giraffes, buffalo, wildebeest, baboons and lots of impala. Luckily for us at the end of the walk we finally saw 100% of Zambia’s finest White Rhino. They were very big and very close to us. Because these animals are in grave danger of being poached they are being guarded 24/7. So it was not difficult to find them after all.

Now that we had seen Livingstone, Lusaka and Kafue National Park, Peggy also wanted to see Mpongwe and meet the people that we live with. So that night we took a night bus to Mpongwe, it was a terrible drive. By the time we reached Mpongwe we were completely exhausted. The first day we actually did not do anything. However the next day we were full of energy again so Peggy and I visited Mr. Kalima’s basic school to provide the children with some pens and color books. He was very grateful. He also took us on a tour through the villages to show Peggy how the people in Mpongwe live. She was very shocked to see these big differences. The last day in Mpongwe was very relaxing. We went to Lake Kashiba, just an hour away from Mpongwe. The water was very nice so we swam a lot. Unfortunately the two weeks went over very fast and now Peggy is already on a plane back to Holland. Now Robert and I are back in Mpongwe so we can focus on our projects again. Just seven more weeks of hard work and then it’s time for a new adventure. I have seen many other countries, but nothing is comparable with the love that I have created for Africa. It is just Zambia that I have seen yet. But I know that I will see more of Africa in my life. I never knew of a morning in Africa when I woke up that I was not happy.